This is the real me.

This is my life… Take it or leave it I am the one that has to live it every day.
Starting out at a very young age it was brought to my attention that I wasn't supposed to be born. I am the youngest of four children. Normally when a sibling tells you this it isn't true. But in my case, I had clarification from my parents… It was true! I didn't have much support and love growing up in my household. It really didn't seem to affect me until I was the only one of my siblings in elementary school. I grew up differently than my siblings. Most of the teenagers I speak to now wish they would have freedom when they were that young. But think about it, a 10 year old growing up by their selves is not the best thing to happen. So I had to grow up at a very young age… Who doesn't now a days? Well thats not the sad part of my story. At the age of 15 (2010) I started talking to this guy I had grown up with my whole life. We started dating a couple months later. That was in June… Come November we had created what I thought was a beautiful relationship… Then things changed very quickly for my liking. At the age of 15, I was raped… Not once…. I stayed in the relationship because he told me he loved me. I was 15 and being told I love you for the first time I was so happy. But two years later and being raped by the same guy four more times was not okay. Finally in December of 2012 I broke it off with this guy. He kept trying to speak to me… I didn't cave. But finally in October 2013 he got ahold of me for the worse. He raped me again… After being raped and abused by this guy for almost 3 years I was seriously messed up. I got diagnosed with PTSD, anxiety, and severe depression in September of 2013. In the past three years I have tried to end my life on several different occasions. I am still here by the grace of God and with the help of my friends. I thank God for that everyday. I still have pain… But this is my life and I have to go through it everyday….
This isn't the end, it is only the beginning for me for now.