Its not living life its just surviving.

I am not living my life. All of my emotion and pain are rising at the surface. Trying to make myself cry just so I get some emotions out. But time and time again I just can't. What's the point? Oh thats right, there is no point. Surviving is all I know how to do I don't know how to actually live. My life isn't a life it's a nightmare. And whenever you have a nightmare your supposed to wake up to get rid of it. So what is it like if you life is a nightmare and not just a dream. Is it the opposite? Should I just go to sleep forever to escape the nightmare? At this moment in time thats all I know how to do. There isn't much left for me to do. Time will tell and then I will know. My time is running short here. All I can do is just keep surviving until it is finally the end. I just hope the end is soon.